Readers of iloveuab.com – I’ve searched this University far and wide in search of the absolute finest UAB Girl and I’ve finally found her. It took me over a year, but I am a man of my word. This month’s Cute UAB Girl Of The Month is wild, sexy, crazy and she loves to party. This is the kind of chick who will watch sports with you, laugh at your stupid jokes, and she’ll even teach you how to funnel a beer. Let me introduce to you the lovely Justin Oliver:

Name: Justin Oliver

GPA: 3.4

Age: 21!!!

Major: bIoLoGy

Home town: Haleyville, AL (home of 911 and nothing else)

Relationship Status:

1.  How did you end up at UAB?

They gave me the best scholarship so I didn’t have to keep my job at the Furnace my whole college career.

She's classy!

2.  What’s your biggest ASSet?

You know I got a donk but i like to think my eyes are the best thing about me

3.  What’s your favorite thing about UAB?

All the different people. And Greek housing and the university’s support for Greeks. Haha…

4.  Boxers or Briefs?

Boxer briefs of course! You get the freedom of boxers with the support of briefs.

She has hot friends!

5.  If you could have any man in the world, who would he be?

That’s a tough one! Umm… Bill Clinton would be a classic choice but Tiger Woods seems like he’s got something cool going on so I kind of want to see what that’s all about. Or there’s this guy that lives in Camp Hall, Cameron Brimer. He’s just plain dreamy!!

6.  Let’s say you were stuck on a deserted island for a month. What three things would you want to have with you?

Sunglasses so I can keep my swag on at all times. Thong for even tanning. And… my iPod so I can jam to some Lady Gaga the whole time.

7.  Do you have any Tatoos? If not, what would you get?

I’m actually having one drawn for me now! It’s a bald eagle holding an American flag in front of two crossed shotguns and a scroll below it that says “Momento Mori” It means remember you’re mortal. Really ties the whole thing together.

8.  When did you lose your virginity? Was it a magical moment?

Well… it was definitely unforgettable. Luckily I had a spare inhaler and gatorade. Ask Eric George to tell you the handwash story if you want to know all the details.

9.  Have you ever ran from the police or campus security?

Not yet but I’m going to for the Alpha Xi Delta Jail n’ Bail this month. I’m going to be arrested on the Green but I’m gonna see how long I can run from them.

10. Have you ever been in a cat fight? Did you win?

Sure have. I wrestled a cat one time and lost. Worst sexual experience of my life.

11. Miley Cyrus or the other one? Uhhh, Taylor Swift, yeah her. Which one you like best?

Miley Cyrus fer sure cuz I know someone who went to school with Taylor Swift and he said she’s a bitch. No one liked her until her album came out.

Popularity: 3% [?]

Here are some more iloveuab.com posts that you may enjoy

1. Cute UAB Girl Of The Month: Samantha Simmons Do you think UAB President Carol Z Garrison would be...
2. Cute UAB Girl Of The Month: Katie Johnston 1. Tweezers. I mean, no one wants a splinter or...
3. Cute UAB Girl of the Month: Pamela Hayes I will be posting about one cute UAB girl per...